October 18 2016 We say goodbye to Tess

Tess had a fabulous 2015 and almost right up to a few days before she died she had been amazing. We put her on Arctic Sea tablets from Forever which really seemed to help her. Along side her heart tablets she was doing amazing. She was running along the back grassed area. She loved to play and have lots of short walks. Lots of trips to the lovely beach too.

Alas on a few days before the 18th October 2016 I knew there was something very wrong with Tess. She seemed confused and then she stopped eating. It broke my heart to see her like this. I took her to the vets knowing it was time to say goodbye. They thought it might be something else and took blood tests etc., but I knew, I was her mum. She didn’t want to take her meds. She had always taken her meds. She didn’t want to eat or drink.

The vet asked me to come back the next day. Watching her go down hill so quick was awful. I cried all the way to the vets and cried while I was there. It was more than time. I couldn’t put her through another day of this. It was time to say goodbye. With her laying beside me on the floor in the small vets room I said goodbye. She quietly slipped away from me. I am sure she knew what was happening. She just lay still and we said our goodbyes.

Even now a year later I write this post while crying. I do miss her so much. I always vowed never to be selfish. Making that decision for your pets is the hardest thing to do but they have to have their dignity and they have to have quality of life.

She has been twice to visit me in my sleep. She came for a hug and I think to let me know she is OK. She looked happy. I think she just wanted me know that she’s here with us.

The photo below is Buddy and Tess together. You can see how happy they are lying waiting for the tea in the kitchen.

I have also added a photo of Buddy only a few weeks after Tess died. You can see how sad he is. He really still does miss her and I often look at him and see him looking sad.

We had Tess cremated and I was going to scatter her ashes on the land behind the house. Somewhere where she loved to run and walk each day but it seemed so cold a winter I have kept her inside our house. Her ashes are in a small box with a beautiful card from the company that cremated her. I don’t want her to be alone. I just want her to be here with us in the house.

Buddy stays upstairs now Tess has gone. He seems to like being in our bedroom. Why? we don’t know and we probably never will.

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